Delaware Voters, LISTEN UP!

'O'Donnell Is All Up In My State, Stimulating My Base

Tea is boring, but the crackers can really bring it!


So there I was last night, thinking about how crappy of an election year this was going to be with Chris Coons likely to succumb to Mike Castle.  I love me some Joe, but it sucked that his senate seat looked pretty much lost.

But then it happened.
 
The crazy train rammed through my innocent little state and popped off an explosion of idiocy so great that Karl Rove is shaking his head and Colmes on Faux News is giggling like a school girl.

Oh, Christine.  OOOOOO, Christine.

When you emerged from your little niche in Tea Tardia, I thought that you would bring the world nothing but pain, but now Coon’s headquarters are flooding with phone calls of people volunteering their support – CASTLE supporters.

:shivers:

I’m not cool enough to be bi, but you’ve rocked my world this morning.  See, before Coons winning was really a long shot.  And now?  Now you’ve made it more than likely that we’ll retain Biden’s seat.  See, you’ve actually done the thing here that’s been crazy hard to do lately, which is motivate my Dem base to move and shake and vote, and OOOO Christine, the end result is looking downright ORGASMIC.

I’ll admit to apathy about the Coon’s campaign before, but now that you’ve turned up the heat I can’t wait to jump right in to watch you finish yourself off. 

Jeebus, I'm shaking with anticipation;  Questionable Lawsuits, Financial Woes,Lying in Court Depositions, God Hates Wanking Position (Whoops!)Ex-Managers calling her a fraud


This one's for you, Christine O’Donnell, Palin’s very special mama.




Oh Christine, I forgot myself, I needed you to remind me......



And, as a special treat, I propose an official "Rub One Off For Coons" Money Bomb.  $10 for every "O".  No cheating! 


http://www.actblue.com/entity/fundraisers/23738

Go on.  Click it.  A LOT.  Oh Yes!  Lets get those numbers 'Up'.  That's right....just like that.....

The Eight Year Old Sings Kesha's 'Tik Tock'

Elise Sing's 'Tik Tok'



A cleaned up version of the song with the little one doing a pretty good imitation of Kesha, if I don't say so myself. :D

Nationals, Inc. ‘True Beauty’ Pageants: Miss Teen Wilmington - An Exposé

It starts with a letter in the mail. Unsolicited. This should be your first clue that all is not as it seems with the Miss Teen (Insert Whatever Town They're Preying On Here) Pageant. Or, as of the publication of this blog they have renamed all their info sites to Pageantry With Purpose| Miss Teen Cities Of America. HAHAHA. But anyhow, it’s not local. In fact, National’s Inc, the company that manages these pageants are all over the country. The letter is probably from Anna Klejnowski, a ‘pageant coordinator. Who is this woman and how is she qualified to run these pageants? Also, where did she get the time-turner since she is, according to her calendar of events for all of her 'local' pageants, capable of being in many places at the same time? Funny thing is, ‘different’ people have been known to play the role of Anna, and there is speculation that she doesn’t even exist. It would certainly explain how she can be the 'local' coordinator for pageants all over the country. Especially since she mails all of her letters from Hermitage, Pennsylvania.

The contest domain - http://wilmingtonpageant.com - is ‘private’. That is something that doesn’t point to a reputable organization. After all, a business domain is normally public. And make no bones about it, this is a business. This is not a community service. This is not a non-profit.

According to the Nationals Inc, website , the ‘mission’ of these pageants is to raise self esteem, to teach the girls poise. It’s not about their ‘looks’, and there is no talent competition. There is a formal wear division, but that’s just because the girls like dressing up. You aren’t expected to pay any money, you just need to go out and get some ‘sponsors’. Sounds okay, right? I mean, it sure doesn’t SOUND like those little girl pageants that JonBenet Ramsey shed light on with her untimely murder.

So what’s the deal with these things?

Putting aside all the issues I have with pageants for children in general, the major red flags regarding this pageant are the following:

Money, Money, Money

In the letter, it states:  

The Miss Teen Wilmington Pageant  is sponsored through different businesses and organizations in Greater Wilmington and surrounding areas.

Of course,  none of these businesses are listed in the letter.  The “local sponsors” are businesses you and your child have to go out and seek in order to raise the $495 fee they charge you to be in this ridiculous thing. But it doesn't stop there.  The $495 for your child to attend isn’t where the money stops. They frequently charge between $15-20 a person to go and be in the audience. So this means if you invite your friends and family, they’ll each have to pay their way in.

So what DO you get for your $495?  Not much, unless you raise additional funds through paid ads in their 'Program Books'.  Heck, you don't even get entrance into all of the competitions, like Miss. Photogenic.  Entering that one will run you another $125.00

So, is the pageant in general was worth the $495?  This former judge doesn't think so. 

From the Judge: (Contact information on file and available to media on request with written confidentiality agreement.).

The pageant was a cattle call that cumulated in a 4 hour production with no intermission. As a judge who took the time (and money) to provide nice prizes to the winners, I didn't have the opportunity to give them to the girls. It was really annoying.  The staff was very small and they travel to do this pageant each weekend in a different city. It's a boxed pageant - meaning the same thing over and over again and they don't get to know or prepare their girls for the next level. You're not cared about, you're just a number and a fee.

 All pageants are businesses, but this one is just all about the money. The judges were treated horribly and told exactly how to score.

We want you to pay us money  because you're special, like a unique snowflake!  Your naive parent inner beauty is what we're looking for!

When you get the letter saying that your daughter has been 'selected' to participate in this pageant, you might think that she was lucky to get chosen.  You'd be thinking wrong.   Everyone who registers to attend the information session gets 'picked.' Even those that didn’t go. I called the pageant with a sob story about not being able to make the information session, but that my daughter, Wilfina (Wolfie) already has the money and she would love to be in it. And they LET ME REGISTER. (I should mention that Wolfie is my 2 yr old Pomeranian. In their defense, he WOULD look pretty cute in a tiara.)



There is something very important to understand when considering ways in which to satisfy your child's taste for show business and not get sucked into things that do nothing but waste your time and money:

Reputable Agents or Pageant Productions don't send out mass mailings. 

People are practically beating down their doors to get in.  They have waiting lists that are typically MONTHS long, and that's just for an appointment.

Good Advice from the Crimes of Persuasion Website.

1. Beware of any newspaper classified or display ad looking for any kind of model or talent. Modeling agencies have plenty of hopefuls coming to them so they don't have to advertise for models.
2. To avoid being ripped off, aspiring models should look for and attend “open calls”at reputable modeling agencies. Well-known agencies in large cities usually have open calls on a weekly basis.
3. Do not respond to subway, bus or classified ads that promise modeling and acting jobs to people with no experience, or of all ages and sizes, etc.
4. If an agency has to charge money up front it usually means they do not have enough modeling work for either the agency or the model to survive on.
5. You should be free to go to any photographer you want to. Legitimate agencies will provide you with a list of photographers that you could go to.

They also don't need to charge fees.  They actually have the connections and resources to provide the exposure Nationals, Inc. makes claim to.


Is there an entry fee to compete in the Miss America system?
No, there is not an entry fee to compete in the Miss America system.

How about Miss Delaware or Miss USA? 

You absolutely have to pay fees for this, but they don't attempt to hide behind non-profit status.  In fact, they're fairly open about their commercial affiliations.  They're a business and they say they're a business.  Also, if you win this thing?  Well, they're offering a heck of a prize package.  

These Nationals, Inc. pageants describe themselves as a stepping stone to the Miss American and Miss USA programs, but they are unaffiliated. Not that that would better my opinion of them, but at least those pageants are up front about the stupid crap they do.

Just for fun, lets do the the math so far...

• $495 Pageant fee
• $125 Miss photogenic
• $100 formal gown
• $100 business attire, formal shoes, etc.
• $40 mom and dad’s ticket to the pageant

TOTAL = $860
See how that works?

EXPOSURE!  (Or, really, lack thereof)

Think you'll get to hang with important folks in the modeling industry?  Maybe meet a fashion phtographer who sees that 'spark' in you?

Fat chance.  The judges for these things are often provided by vendors– that’s right, once you pay your way in you’ll be bombarded with pamphlets about photo packages, modeling schools, formal dress boutiques, etc. They offer paid booths to these various vendors so they can solicit you, and 'extras' to the ones who can offer up unqualified judges.   Oh, and if the 'Vendors' are sex offending photographers trying to set up appointments with your child that isn't something they're responsible for, just so you know.

To add insult to injury, some of the judges are just staff filling in to look the part.  In fact, some of them have been caught working the registration desks. That’s called conflict of interest, people.

And you would think they could do better (@$495 a pop!) at getting a least one or two experienced judges:

If u look at the brochure for the pageant, the girls who had the large number of sponsors ended up in the top 10. 2 of the pageant contestants were sponsored by two of the judges businesses they own?

WINNINGS! (Um...Maybe?)

Well, the winner of the local pageant gets a trip to Orlando, right?  Right?  Yep. She sure does.  The girl's  trip is all-expense paid 5 nights, but what about you? They fail to tell you that part. The CHAPERONE is responsible for their own hotel, airfare, etc. AND she must have an adult chaperone to attend. They make it seem like the parent is automatically included.

So free vacay?  Not really.

Add about another $1,000 to your tab if she get's picked to attend this thing in Orlando.


And the pressure to keep going once you've registered is pretty intense. I mean, you’ve likely already sent out a nifty letter to your local press about your child being ‘selected’ like they recommend you do, so you’re invested in her winning at this point.

So, there's something else, right?  Scholarship money? 

In a feeble rebuttal to this expose, they wrote on their FB page:

One of the highlights of our prizes is the opportunity to have the winners represent their particular city at the National COA competition that takes place in Orlando, Florida. Those participating at this level compete for over $60,000.00 in prizes including $40,000.00 in cash scholarships.

Do you get money at the local level?  Who knows.  They certainly don't seem to be advertising that for Delaware, at least.  Maybe you'll need to pay that trip to Orlando to be eligible for that.

And, after contacting the BBB (Better Business Bureau) there is a string of contestants who won Nationals, Inc. competitions who NEVER RECEIVED A DIME of their ‘scholarship’ money over the last 36 months, or only resolved the issue after having filed a complaint. They are indeed a BUSINESS, and not a BBB accredited one. These pageant companies are profit making companies. I f they gave away a lot in prizes, they wouldn't make any money. It costs them to put on the pageant and stage the 'free' information sessions and send off all the mailings. After these costs and their profit, how much do you really think is available for prizes?

But what about the ‘modeling contract’ ?  It's with John Casablanca. They essentially get people to pay to take their classes, have them sign a contract, and then likely you never hear from them again. One of the complaints filed was that even if you 'won' this contract, you were expected to enroll in a 22 month program,

one night a week, with a tuition cost of $2,500, before you'd be qualified to be sent out on jobs. Some prize, huh?

Enlightening Stuff here about how Casablanca treats their models: : (From easybackgroundchecks)

 Thus John Casablancas of Elite was quoted referring to rates lower than 20% as follows: "Everybody does it. But there is no point doing it unless it is secret. When we started we had telephones and nothing else. It was spooky. A few of the top girls got a . . . discount." (emphasis added) This kind of covert variation from a standard price is flatly contrary to what one would expect in a competitive market – and exactly consistent with the existence of an industry-wide agreement on prices that individual defendants might opportunistically violate to keep a particularly lucrative account.

And what about Anna Klejnowski? 

Last year at this time,after receiving an unsolicited letter, my wife and I took our 12 y/o daughter to the same venue you will be attending tomorrow. At that time a Mrs Anna Klejnowski gave the presentation. She was in her 40's, a self proclaimed pageant veteran (in my opinion she didn't have the looks) with years of wins. She also stated that she was a child psychology major and a volunteer who worked with drug addicted teens with AIDS. It was a real tear jerker. There was also a heartwarming story about her grandmother wave from her porch wearing her banner.

Well, if you thought the judges were iffy, AT LEAST, they're real people:

This year we received another letter and out of curiosity  we responded, so tonight, a year later in Gainesville a different Mrs Anna Klejnowski gave the same presentation. This time she was an attractive 26 year old blond who was the reigning Miss Colorado (no confirmation of this on the internet anywhere) and she was a full time psychology student and a volunteer who worked with troubled teen girls. Coincidentally she shared the same grandmother story with the woman of the previous year. Are you starting to see something fishy here?

And when I pull the company file, there is no Anna Klejnowski listed.   So either Anna is really generous of her time or I think we should maybe write her off as a make believe front woman.   I guess it makes sense.  But why a fake?  Well lets, take a look at who is really behind Nationals, Inc. 

Nationals, Inc is a private company categorized under Consultants-Business (Unclassified) and located in Hermitage, PA. Current estimates show this company has an annual revenue of $720,000 and employs a staff of approximately 10. 

HQ, Branch or Single Location 
Single Location   (Wow, so when you said you had to contact 'Corporate where were you, out to lunch somewhere?) 



 Annual Sales (Estimated)
720,000 

Employees (Estimated) 
 10     (TEN PEOPLE!)

So who owns this?  A guy by the name of  Joseph Yourchisin.  A businessman.

Who also owns these:

Northeast Medical Consulting Inc Test Development and Evaluation Service in Hermitage, PA
American Alternative Technolog Environmental Consultant in Hermitage, PA
Clean World Inc Environmental Consultant in Hermitage, PA
Wpi Wallace & Pancher Inc Environmental Consultant in Hermitage, PA
On Line Consulting Systems Engineering Consultant, Ex. Computer or Professional in Hermitage, PA

Probably not as enticing to get a mass mailing from some dude named Joe in Pa who wants you to dish out five hundred bucks to get dressed up and romp around on stage for people that only want to sell you things.  Not as enticing, but a heck of a lot closer to the truth.

This is the part where I say....  RUN!  RUN LIKE THE WIND!

This company, like many others, preys on little girls with stage dreams. They take advantage of parents wanting to support their children in this, and they should be treated like the predators they are. I urge legitimate businesses to steer clear of these people and parents to contact your local Attorney Generals office if you've already given them money thinking they were a non-profit.

I'm making fairly simple statements in this post.  It wouldn't be all that difficult to rebut if it was the truth.  But it isn't.  So I won't hold my breath.


Agents who work reputably within the industry charge you either very little (35$ one time fee to assist in overhead) or nothing. They only get paid when you do. NO LEGITIMATE AGENCY will contact you out of the blue. Unless you're already famous in some way, the chance of that happening is pretty much nil.

FYI, this expose was prompted by these people making an attempt to scam my Goddaughter. And just so you know, Hell Hath No Fury like a Fairy Godmother who is more than willing to stick her magic wand up the a-- of scammers that attempt to mess with her babies.

LOLLY

Inside The Minnesota Tea Party! And Oh Look, They're Serving Tarts!

Texts from an inside operative at the Palin/Bachmann rally in Minneapolis, Minnesota.



April 7th, 2010 – Minneapolis Convention Center – 1:15pm

Agent M:   I’m here.   I am standing next to a woman with no teeth and her adult son has an odd limp.  Why are these people opposed to health care reform again?

Lolly:  I would say Darwinism, but I’m thinking that isn’t it.   I can’t believe you’re giving up a day off work for this.  You could be drinking and gambling all day like a respectable liberal.

Agent M:  I had a stiff drink in the taxi over here.  And now I’m gambling with my LIFE.

Lolly:   You’re a white girl, just keep a low profile and project a lot of bitterness and rage. 

Agent M:  I know, but it’s hard.  I got here too early. I’m too close to the front.  What if they sense my fear?

Lolly: Oh please, they can’t even sense their OWN fear.  If anyone starts to suspect anything, just act like you’re near tears.  For motivation, remind yourself that these people are actually allowed to vote.

Agent M:  Thank you.  This helps. 

-----------------

Agent M:  Srry.  I drank too much and I had to pee.  Then this crazy chick started chatting me up about ‘Revolutions’.

Lolly:   You didn't take a wide stance in the stall, did you?

Agent M:  Wah.

----

Agent M:  These people are stone cold crazy!  Woman two rows up is mumbling about sending Obama back to his real home - Iraq.  What?
Lolly:  Do you mean in that this is where she thinks he’s from?  Her email forward about him being from Kenya must have been hacked.

Agent M:  Apparently. 

Lolly: Tell her it’s a proven fact that he isn’t from Iraq.  Tell her they’ve discovered he might not be human at all, but a science experiment done by Nancy Pelosi.  Everyone knows she's into witchcraft.

Agent M:  No comment.

Lolly:  What?  If they’re spreading lies, they could at least be funny ones.

---

Agent M :  Bachmann said something about Pink Elephants.  I got here early, so there’s no way I missed the ‘happy brownies’  and I have no clue what she’s talking about.  Plus, PINK ELEPHANTS?!  Does she know how to use Google.

Lolly:  The ‘Google’ is the tool of the Devil, and Obama, or the same person depending on your denomination.    You probably missed the brownies when you went to pee.

Agent M:  That sucks.  I’m hungry, too, but the vendors frighten me.  There is a Muslim looking guy selling hot dogs.  That’s one brave dude.

Lolly: Well, it’s  a Tea Party, right?  They only thing they promised to serve were the ‘Tarts.’

Agent M:  LOL, wow that’s awesome.  And totally not gender specific.

Lolly:  Hell, No.  When you sell yourself for the sake of personal gain you’re a Tart.  Tim Pawlenty?  Total tart.

Agent M:  Totally.  And I still think Coburn is a douchebag.

Lolly: Yeah, but I’m upgrading him to ‘fresh scent’.

Agent M:  I hate you.

---

Agent M: Palin looks off today.  What’s with the all black and the massive amounts of bling?

Lolly:  Talisman to ward off the likes of you.

Agent M:  It’s working.  That, and the music.  I want to hide under something and click my heels together at this point.  I swear, I think I actually see some woman FOAMING from her nostrils.

Lolly:   You know, that’s probably what happened to Coburn.   He worked a long time at his perfect GOP asshat routine only to have it crack a little when he realized he was surrounded by batshit crazy and his secret service guy was off taking a leak.

Agent M:  Or chatting up a Young Eagle with a very wide stance.

Lolly:  Indeed

---

Lolly:  What’s going on now?

Agent M:  Some radio guy called Obama a lying commie.  I think clicking my heels together actually worked.  By the hairstyles and language, I’ve been transported back to 1985.

Lolly:  No, no, their hair always looks like that.  It’s how they can protect their brains from all those confusing and sinful facts.

Agent M:  I should have borrowed my cousin’s bump –it.  Palin keeps looking at Bachmann’s hair.  They seem to genuinely like each other.   Maybe too much.  It’s sort of uncomfortable. 

Lolly: Ew.  I hope they aren't sending out a gay vibe, because really, Lesbians don't need those two soiling their good name.

Agent M:  I know.  Every Lesbian watching them on television just lost a little bit of her gay.  

Lolly: Hold onto yours.  Your wife can cook like nobody's business. 

Agent M:  I'm trying.

Lolly:  Just picture Rush Limbaugh naked.

Agent M:  Got my gay back.  Thanks.

---

Agent M:  Bachmann just said something about being concerned about Obama being anti-American, then something about Nostradamus.  Nostradamus said something about Obama?  What?  Also, hasn’t nearly everything that guy predicted been proven wrong?

Lolly:  NOSTRADAMUS? WHAT?  (Quote found later - “I said I had very serious concerns that Barack Obama had anti-American views, and now I look like Nostradamus”)

Agent M:  NOSTRA-FUCKING-DAMUS

Lolly:  Okay, you’ve sacrificed enough.  Get the hell out of there before they start rounding up people without that ‘rabid deer in the headlights’ look and using them for target practice.

Agent M:  I’m going.   Bachmann is starting to tell War stories and the guy next to me is shouting in my ear. 

Lolly:  Make sure you get in there good with a Q-Tip tonight.

Agent M:  I will.  Just in case the crazy is contagious.

Lolly:  It is, but only if you rock the bump-its.


--

Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed chatting with Agent 'M'.  (Thanks Michelle, I love you and I appreciate you risking your life just to get a firsthand account of the crazy.)